Two pills, of course metaphorical, but you have two pills in front of you right now. The Red one would end all this suffering right now, a dead end at the new road you took. The Blue pill will make you live as long as possible. People say the second one needs strength but I say both do, just the direction is different. Your life isn’t just your’s, your life is like a bike stand, it is holding up things bigger than itself. You have people, emotions, dreams, and what not, all banking on your life. Your life has more sum value to others than it does to yourself. And that’s why it takes courage, because you’re not just ending your own life. You’re ending dreams, leaving behind a hole in everyone’s heart, everyone who actually loved you. You really don’t see how any person could do that, at least you haven’t lost your senses yet. You aren’t brave enough to quit.
Then you have to move, walk the new path, explore the jungle road and try to find those small bunnies hiding in there, or as people call it ‘The Silver Lining’.
And just like a movie, you get the motivation just when you need it the most.
“Hey Max! I’m so glad to see you” that same old beautiful voice, the one you love the most. She’s crying. Tears of joy, shouts her big smile. Tears of pain, shouts her burning eyes. She does love you, she does feel your pain. And you were gonna leave her alone with a much bigger cut just so that you could end your own suffering. Human beings can be selfish at times, it’s alright. You made the right choice.
For the first time since The Beginning you hope this is not a dream, you’ve finally made peace with reality. Willpower can do wonders. Look at you, you’ve already found your first bunny.
“Hey man, I have some good news. You can go home tonight.” the first time you actually liked what you heard the Doc say.
“Thank you” you’re tearing up now.
It feels weird, no sensation below your knees. It feels…it feels incomplete. This is your test. This, this is the Blue Pill.